Cry Silent Tears by Joe Peters

By Joe Peters

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Example text

I sat behind the steering wheel in his driving seat and rattled the gear stick around, imitating the movements I’d seen him make when he was driving. I idolized him and wanted to be like him in every way possible. I wasn’t worried about the locked car doors because I knew perfectly well how to open them if I wanted to. Dad had explained it to me very carefully after that time I let the handbrake off. But I wouldn’t have disobeyed him because I respected him completely. If he said I was to stay there then that was what I would do.

Just a few days earlier Marie had imagined she was going to spend the rest of her life with Dad, bringing me up as if I was her own son. Now she was a single mother and my baby half-brother, born just a couple of months before the accident, was all she had left to remember my father by. As we walked home, Mum made sure I knew what had happened. ‘Your dad’s dead now. He ain’t coming back. He’s fucking dead,’ she told me. ’ I asked through my tears. ‘No, he’s gone to hell where all the nasty people go!

Not wanting to leave me in order to run and get the key, and still unable to persuade me to unlock the door in my dazed state, Dad smashed the window and pulled up the lock himself. When he finally managed to pull me out he hugged me so tightly I could hardly breathe. He was crying from the shock of the whole thing and never even told me off. He probably let me get away with more than he should have, but I certainly wasn’t complaining about that. No one in the garage minded that Dad brought me to work – he had been there so long he was pretty much the boss – but it became harder for them to turn a blind eye when Mum started turning up and causing fights, trying to get me back from him, accusing him of kidnapping me, ranting on about his ‘whore’.

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